Playing Favorites.

If you've never read "The Shack" I highly recommend it. God is "Particularly fond" of every single one of us.  Think about that today. You are blessed and highly favored of the Lord. and so am I.

Jesus Wept.

So I've been thinking about all the ways people cope.  Today we had quite the eventful time with the kids, there were only three fights and a few cuss words flying.  When all these things (which have become normalcy to me now) start happening I try to think what exactly is going on for the kids.  They're scared most of the time, they feel like they have to prove their worth and defend themselves at all costs.  Through all the chaos of screaming and breaking up fights its easy to get so frustrated and just want to scream at them to just stop for a second. 

But, that's not what Jesus did.  When Lazarus died and he went to visit Mary and Martha, Martha meets him on the road and He explains that its all going to be for His glory.  When He calls for Mary to come to Him, she comes weeping.  I've heard several explanations about how Jesus responded,some say He wept because He was upset that Lazarus was gone, some say He wept at Mary's lack of faith, but I think it was something entirely different. When Mary came her first instinct was to blame Christ, "If only you'd been here this wouldn't of happened..." She must have been thinking of all the people he had cured and thinking how if he had not waited two days her brother would still be alive.  Like many of us, she blamed God for not coming through for her.  She was hurting and was coping the only way she knew how... and it broke Christ's heart.  He was troubled in His spirit and Jesus wept.  A child of His that He loved beyond belief would think that He wanted her pain.  Jesus felt that hurt, He understood her loss and her pain, and He wept with His child because He loved her and because He cared.

The more I think about this the more I realize that I have so much to learn about being like Christ.  When you love with Christ's love you see through people's defenses and into their hurts.  You learn how to weep with them instead of retaliate. It becomes less about you and more about others.  Love God. Love People.

Learning to follow.

I discovered today that most of my friends have blogs.  I had never thought much about blogging but it is so interesting and its a great way to keep up with everyone (and we all need more technology to distract us...)  So while I'm learning to follow all of my friends and keep up with technology God has been teaching me the same thing in life.  I moved 2 hours from my family and friends when I graduated college (actually even before I graduated) all in an attempt to follow wherever God leads.  I know that there is no where I would rather be than in the center of God's will.  So, while life has had some definite highs and some definite lows since I left home and everyone that I know and love, I have been trusting in the fact that God is going to use my life if I only surrender my will to Him. 

I'm still learning on a daily basis what that looks like.  I have learned that it does not mean being in a ministry and treating it like a business. I have learned that surrendering to Christ means learning to hear His voice over the voice of the World pushing for more success, more accolades, more progress, and more proof.  I am learning that surrendering to Christ means living for His approval only, not the approval of anyone (including family, friends, bosses, coworkers, etc).  There is so much to learn in life and I know that following Christ one step at a time will lead to a life that is blessed by the God of all and that HE will inevitably get all the glory that He deserves.

So, I'm literally just a small town girl who followed God to work at a Children's Home 2 hours south of home.  I work as an Activities Director, interacting with some amazing kids who have so much potential but don't even realize it because of the lives they have been subject to.  I do recreational therapy and attempt to form relationships with the kids here that will give me an avenue to minister to them.  Forming the relationships with the residents is the easy part, its getting them to understand just how wonderful they are and how much Christ loves them that proves to be the challenge.  So, most of my posts will be filled with prayer requests for the people God has placed in my path.  I'll include stories of what I consider breakthroughs and what I consider barriers that I run into. 

Here we GO!!!